What Would Yugi Do?
by Mistress of odd pairings
Summary: When Seto offers to pay for Shizuka's wedding, Jou and Yugi must do anything a group of shonen-ai fangirls want for a whole hour...but will the tables be turned?


A/n: Take this for what you will, but it's supposed to be funny. Please review but no flames please. This takes place in the future when Shizuka is 21.

What Would Yugi Do?

Seto couldn't help but notice the moping puppy and the depressed looking game king as he entered the library one bright Saturday afternoon. Smirking to himself he made his way over to them, making sure to stretch his height as much as he could to seem imposing.

"The library is no place for dogs Yugi, especially whimpering ones. He might give people fleas."

Yugi only sighed and Jonouchi let out an actual whimper that made the CEO crack a smile for just a second.

"What's with you two anyway? Lost your cheer squad or something?"

Jonouchi looked up glaring daggers.

"Can't you shut your trap once in a while, I'm upset over my sister okay. I came here to think and I don't need you and your dog jokes to bother me so just go harass someone else for a change!"

Suddenly concern flashed across Seto's face.

"What about Shizuka?"

Jonouchi snapped his gaze up into cobalt eyes.

"Don't you ever address my sister by her first name in front of me! She's getting married and she refuses to tell me who it is."

Seto gave a secret sigh of relief.

"So what's the problem, aren't you invited?"

He nodded.

"But She won't tell me who she's marrying. I know it's Honda, but I want her to tell me…and I'm afraid he can't give her the life she deserves."

Seto glared.

"What do you mean by that? He can give her anything she wants."

Jonouchi and Yugi both stared at Seto in total shock.

"Why, I suppose you know who he is?"

Seto nodded.

"She's made me promise to keep it a secret but I can assure you he can and will give her everything her heart asks for. And it's not Honda I'm going to make you a deal."

Jonouchi now looked worried.

"What kinda deal?"

Seto smirked.

"If you do something for me I'll pick up the tab for her wedding. Anything she wants no matter how expensive it is…but you have to do what I say."

This was a very hard bargain to let go of. Besides, what could Seto do that hadn't already been done?

"Okay, what do I have to do?"

Seto smirked and looked over at a group of girls sitting at a table with a big white sign 'Yu-Gi-Oh shonen-ai fan club meeting' and waved at them with a smile.

"You see those girls over there? They get together every month and have a meeting of their really cool club. Last month Malik and I promised we'd find a couple of…actors to play in their little videos. All you have to do is what ever they want for one hour while I do my term paper. I'll come get you when time is up. Deal?"

Jonouchi and Yugi looked at each other.

"Okay, but Kaiba-kun…What does shonen-ai mean?"

Seto snickered to himself fiendishly. They had no idea what they would be walking into.

"Studios have one new entertaining neighbor-artificial inelegance. Okay, time starts now. See you later."

He watched in amusement as Yugi and Jonouchi walked over to the table. He pulled out his cell phone and sat down at a computer within viewing distance. This was going to be the show of a lifetime.

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Yugi and Jonouchi sat alone at the table, being filmed by the girls. They had memorized short lines and were now acting them out.

"Yugi…Thanks for helping with that math paper…it was really bugging me."

Yugi smiled and touched his hand.

"It was fun to spend time alone with you. Anzu is always bugging us about friendship, but she never gives us time alone."

Jonouchi nodded but looked away. Yugi clutched his hand tightly, looking worriedly up at Jonouchi's profile.

"What is it Jonouchi? Is something wrong?"

He looked back at Yugi and took his hands into his own.

"I want to…be more than just friends with you. I feel so close to you…I…I love you Yugi."

Yugi moved closer and met his forehead with Jonouchi's, closing his eyes with a smile.

"I love you too Jou-chan."

Suddenly one of the girls shouted.

"That's a wrap! And in one take too, you guys have got chemistry!"

Yugi and Jonouchi sat quietly, now sitting on complete opposite sides of the table. Jonouchi leaned over and started to say something to Yugi, but the girls noticed how close they were, nearly nose-to-nose, and Jonouchi's confused look was interpreted as one of affection so they were told to stay like that until the girls had gotten a picture.

"Hey Yugi…is it just me or are these lines a little…weird?"

Yugi nodded.

"I guess it's true though. Maybe in America best friends say they love each other."

Jonouchi nodded.

"Yeah, we gotta remember that they're not from around here. Well it's been almost thirty minutes so we'll be outta here soon."

Yugi nodded.

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Seto sat chuckling quietly as he went back to his project. 'Yeah…I really should get them out before they go too far. On the other hand…'

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Now they were looking at history books. Jonouchi Started to pull down a heavy one when a whole stack fell, right towards Yugi. Jonouchi jumped out of instinct and dove to the ground, pulling him out of the way just in time.

"Yugi are you okay!"

Yugi's face was turning blue.

"As soon as you get off me I think I'll be fine thanks."

In the action of saving him from being crushed by books, he'd also landed on top of him.

"I'm so sorry! Gee I bet I was crushing you just as much as those books would have."

Yugi shook his head as the two sat up.

"Neah…the books are probably lighter."

Jonouchi stood and reached out his hand.

"Come on, I'll help you up."

But as Yugi tried to sand he fell into Jonouchi's arms and tears sprang to his eyes.

"I think my ankle is broken! I don't think I can walk!"

Jonouchi looked down into Yugi's tearful eyes.

"It's okay, I'll carry you."

Yugi smiled slightly through his tears.

"You wouldn't mind?"

He shook his head with a warm smile.

"I don't mind holding you."

He picked up Yugi and walked back over to the table, the girls following with their video camera. Jonouchi Set Yugi down as soon as the girls yelled cut.

"Hey, I didn't really hurt you did I?"

Yugi shook his head.

"You're pretty light."

Jonouchi chuckled slightly.

"But I bet you're used to being on top."

Yugi turned beat red.

"Jonouchi! Anzu and me never did that! I told you she just forgot her change of clothes!"

This caused the girls to go into a fit and they crowded around the guys.

"Tell us more!"

Yugi shoed them away as he shook his head franticly.

"Stop that! Can we just get on with this? Our hour is almost up!"

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Seto had been sneaking glances the whole time and shook his head in amusement.

"I can't believe they haven't figured it out yet."

Malik's voice suddenly made him jump.

"Yeah, well if I recall correctly, they had us until we had to climb into bed and…"

Seto smacked his hand across Malik's mouth.

"I don't want everyone to know about that! I had a hard enough time destroying the tape!"

Malik smirked as he looked over at the flustered Yugi and Jonouchi.

"They're taking it slow today…but you know, they would make the cutest couple…"

Seto stared at him as he walked away. 'Only he would say something like that…' He glanced back at the two, now huddled together, Jonouchi 'bandaging' Yugi's leg and grinned. 'On the other hand now that I think about it…"

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"And now you follow us to this back room where we're shooting our last scene."

Jonouchi and Yugi carefully walked into the room, each looking like scared rabbits about to be baked. Jonouchi gave a nervous chuckle as he looked around.

"Wow guys, this is like a perfect duplicate of my room…down to Mai's…"

Yugi gave him a shocked look.

"What, I'm twenty-four. You didn't think her 'nursing' me back to health was all work did you?"

He then turned back to the armada of fangirls.

"Just how did you get it so detailed, I left Mai asleep this morning so if her clothes are here than why isn't she?"

The lead fangirls smiled.

"We're fangirls, it's our job to get everything right. Now lets read over your scripts. We want everything perfect."

Yugi and Jonouchi flipped open their scripts and started reading. Yugi looked up at Jonouchi.

"I'm supposed to be really tired and I 'accidentally' fall asleep in his bed? How can that happen?"

Jonouchi looked up at Yugi with a petrified look on his face.

"And then I'm supposed to get in…yeah and then I'm supposed to say…"

Yugi stared at the script in horror.

"And then I'm supposed to…and he takes off…and then I say and…"

Both looked up at each other and yelled.

"I don't even think so!"

The girls looked sad.

"But Seto-chan and Malik sama actually got in bed before they said no. Can't we just take pictures of you cuddling together?"

Jonouchi looked up at her suddenly.

"Kaiba did this? With the freaky Ishtal?"

Yugi got an evil smirk.

"Do you still have the tapes?"

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Seto looked up suddenly as he heard Yugi's anguished voice.

"NO! I WON'T DO ANOTHER LINE! NOT UNTIL SETO SAYS HE LOVES ME!"

Fangirls in toe he marched up to the CEO and got down on his knees.

"Seto! Love me! Please say you'll love me! Marry me!"

Seto blinked for a moment until Jonouchi walked up.

Tears streamed down his face.

"If you really want Yugi…you can have him…if you win at a duel."

Logic left his brain and he stood.

"Any day mutt!"

With fangirls magic they stacked Seto's deck to lose.

A large crowed had gathered to watch the duel.

Point after point Seto lost.

He fell to his knees as the red eyes black dragon attacked him.

Jonouchi smiled coldly down at Seto as he attached a leash to Yugi's collar.

"Now he's all mine…and so are you! Put on your collar of defeat so that I can lead you around like the mutt that you are."

Two fangirls managed to hold him long enough to get the collar and leash on.

Jonouchi yanked on it, pulling Seto farther down.

"If you submit to me I'll let you go. Tell me who you really are. Say that you're a dirty rotten mutt!"

Seto stared around in humiliation and decided the punishment would be worse if he let this situation continue.

"Okay, I'm a dirty rotten mutt."

Suddenly he noticed that the crowed was all female with the exception of a hysterical Malik. And then he noticed that there was a microphone in his face. Then he heard the last word he wanted to hear again in his life.

"CUT!"

He yanked the collar off and stood. The lead fangirls chirped happily as she dove on him.

"That was perfect Seto-chan! The girls back at HQ are gonna love this! You gave us two pairings in one movie!"

As the girls packed up to go home, Seto, Malik, Jonouchi, and Yugi sat together outside on the curb.

Seto was the first one to speak and he patted Jonouchi's back as he stood.

"You're a pretty good actor for a mutt brother-in law."

And climbed back into his waiting limo.

Jonouchi suddenly looked up.

"WHAT! Kaiba you jerk! You mean I didn't have to go through that at all!"

Malik fell into another laughing fit as Jonouchi ran after the limo, still shouting.

"You may be marrying my sister but that don't meant I can't still beat you up! Studios have one new entertaining neighbor-Artificial inelegance my (horn beeping as he runs in front of a car.) I'm not through with you! Get back here!"

Yugi couldn't shake a sudden fear as he began to walk home.

"I really hope Anzu doesn't get a hold of this…"

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"On a leash and collar? My…big brother had you on a leash and collar?"

Seto nodded as he sprawled out on his bed while Shizuka was sitting next to him, rubbing his shoulders. He suddenly yelped as she dug her nails into his back.

"Good, I hope you learned a lesson!"

And she stormed out. The lead fangirls came around the corner in a maid uniform and smiled at Shizuka who gave her a hundred yen.

"Thanks Hanna, that tape will be perfect entertainment at the bacheloret party! I'm just sorry I didn't send him down there an hour earlier!"

The end

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Yeah, I think I could have lost my mind but I hope it was funny. Please review but no flames. Ja!


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